Care, or Don't Care?
When you are learning to let yourself off the hook, it can be helpful to assess if the perfection you are striving for is really something you value.
Find phrases to ask yourself to evaluate if this anger/frustration/pain/disappointment you are feeling with yourself is something that really matters to you…or not.
Here are some examples:
Will this matter a year from now?
Do I really care about the outcome?
Can fixing this issue wait until later?
Is my expectation unreasonable?
Does this have to be addressed right now?
Whose judgement am I really worried about?
Do I really care what that person thinks?
Am I hurting other people with my obsessing over this issue?
This practice becomes easier with time and you naturally begin to navigate thinking about what really matters and quieting the mind around what doesn’t deserve your stress.
After doing this practice, you will better define your values and soften your tendency to stress over trivial things. Those you live with will likely notice the outcomes of this practice. Clutter around the house, overthinking what to wear, being overwhelmed by messes, and feeling judged by others triggers our perfectionism monster that often hurts those we live with the most.
Not caring so much about things that don’t matter is a fast pass toward peace and happiness. Care about what matters. Love more, care about perfection less.